the problem of pain has been around since mankind entered the scene. God wasn’t surprised by our affliction…or by the the idols we’d turn to for relief. He isn’t surprised by our short term memory either. His mercy toward us is confounding. and we…we just continue to forget to remember that He is up to good for our souls.
His heart breaks for us as we layer on burdens and scurry about, filling up our lives with duty and distraction…shutting down and masking off the acuteness of our pain. our skewed and stubborn thinking even convinces us that we can elude or escape it. in short, us humans are a confused mess. it’s almost as if our very brokenness keeps us pinned up against the wall with no way out. we don’t even know how badly we need grace. grace that flows endlessly from a Father who understands our pain. One who invites us into rest, realness and to be known in our mess…the very darkest, dirtiest mess and to be loved there.
still we reject this lavishing…and are satisfied with self effort.
attempt after attempt to tidy ourselves.
to cover our shame. to partake of our mere sliver of a “nice life”
we are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition, when infinite joy is offered us, like an arrogant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. we are far too easily pleased. -C. S. Lewis
…so we sit in our mud puddle, buried in self contempt. trying to scrub the mess off. not having a clue how to escape the inner angst.
we run hard. medicate. disengage. try to just feel ok.
but His love runs us down and brings us to our knees. so that looking bad in the face of the Father’s love is the only life line He gives. we must grab hold of His mercy , forgiveness and covering …knowing that His lavish and drenching love is truly our only hope.
we can stop running away from the very thing we need in the moment of our darkest hour. stop running away from grace. keeping it at arms length when our soul is crying out for it…believing we don’t deserve it.
but God knew all along that our self-reliance would box us in. that we would tend to get ourselves so stuck, we’d need an all out rescue. we’d need Him to come down…
to save us.
save us from ourselves, from our pain, from our forgetting.
come Jesus and find us here…in our pitiful state. forgive our forgetfulness , forgive our dependence on things we can touch and see and give us a reckless faith. heal our broken thinking and flood us with Your waterfall of grace. we are desperate for You.